amortizing:

me: “sleeps for 5 hours” tired
me: “sleeps for 17 hours” tired
me: “sleeps for a month” tired
me: “sleeps for a year” still tired

panicatthedanetrain:

"what would you do if your boyfriend cheated on you?"

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hbunot:

how would you even start sex like kiss kiss oh ok look im inside you

poryqon:

if you dont eat the pizza crust you are weak and natural selection is coming for you

snorlaxatives:

waking up and realizing you still have more time to sleep

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